Dating, am I right? If I had one word to sum it up it'd be "ugh." Most of my friends feel the same way. We all like the idea, but whenever it actually becomes a reality. . .
WE FREAK OUT!
I should just cancel, right?
The hour before he picks you up, you call your friends. So, I have the flu. 99% sure. I mean, I just coughed. My hair won't cooperate. I do not subscribe to astrology BUT my zodiac sign is not encouraging. This is a bad idea.
Should I shave my legs?
Absolutely not. He should like me for me. Below the knee.
What do I even do with my hands?
He picks you up, you walk awkwardly to the car. You're just far apart enough that he can't grab your hand. What do you do? You don't even know if he washes his hands yet. Now you're in the car. Gesticulate mildly.
What is small talk?
What's your favorite color? What do you do for a living? How's the weather? Do you have issues with your parents? Are you secretly, weirdly religious? It's the absolute worst.
Why is he sitting so close?
Oh he's into this. Am I into this? Is he touching my leg? Oh don't do that, I didn't shave.
How many other people do you think he's dating?
He's smooth, too smooth. This can't be real. Run away. Is he gay?
Do I pretend to want to pay?
I'm an independent woman; I don't need him to pay for my meal. But he could at least offer. Oh wait, he grabbed the bill. Phew. Avoided explaining that one.
Why is he calling me?
Stalker. Oh wait, no, that's cute. Awww he's a gentleman. Crap, what do I say? Hello? Hi? Sup? **Play it cool, act natural.**
Goodnight kiss?
Oh this is so cliche. No don't walk me to the door. No, wait, do. Ahhhh.
Okay, drive safe... I'll talk to you tomorrow... Maybe...
